First off, think of this less as a "what to buy" list, and more of the conversation over beers if a friend was asking my advice on what kind of gear to purchase, and in what order.
The gear you choose is a very personal decision, and no one can make that call for you. What I can do is to show you what choices I have made for myself and why.
Your choices may well be different. Perhaps way different. And that's cool. For myself, the choices listed below were hard-won by the experience of 35 years as a photographer, with 20+ years as a staff newspaper shooter.
Translation: Grad degree from the School of Hard Knocks.
My choices may or may not be exactly yours, you'll likely not go hugely wrong having been guided by them.
NOTE: If you are just starting out, Lighting 101 has an detailed primer on a beginner's lighting kit. I'd recommend going there first.
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The below segments are linked together, so you can easily read them in sequence if you want. Or jump in anywhere from the following links:
1. Cameras
2. Lenses
3. Lights
4. Triggers
5. Light Stands
6. Soft Modifiers
7. Hard and Specialty Modifiers
8. Tripods
9. Cases and Carts
10. Books and More